Jewish Jokes of the Week: Parshas Ki Teitzei
1. I once overheard a man telling over the following true story: He was driving in some hick town and was pulled over by a cop for speeding. This police officer had never seen a Jew before and became very suspicious of his tzitzis. All he saw were some long strings sticking out of his pants and he was worried that they were the wires of a bomb. Telling over the story, the man said, “Can you guys imagine- the cop thought that I was a terrorist…”
I couldn’t control myself and interrupted him, “Not only that, but he probably suspected you of belonging to a FRINGE GROUP!”
2. According to the Kabbalah, we are supposed to have 13 knots on our tzitzis. But we have a problem: how do we count exactly 13 knots without making an ayin hora (evil eye)? My suggestion is to count them like this: Knot one, knot two, knot three…
(If you don’t find this joke funny, you may be missing a little contextual background. This article, on ayin hara and the prohibition of counting Jews, may help.)
3. Why did the ben sorer u’moreh (wayward and rebellious son) get stoned?
Because he drank too much wine!
(For more background on the wayward and rebellious son, try this article.)